Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
