This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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