i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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