he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
