is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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