hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
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