I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
