fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
