ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
