it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
