My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
