i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
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well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
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don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
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