good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
