High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
