3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
