how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
