oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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