i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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