Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize