I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I think people are normalizing furries
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
