I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I hate all girls vehemently.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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