So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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