We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
