By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
