She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize