he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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