then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
