I hate all girls vehemently.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Randomize
