you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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