Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
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