but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
