I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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