Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
