Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
