You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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