Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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