This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
