perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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