Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
