the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
