distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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