Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
