Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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