Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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