The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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