You can't special order awesome
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
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