Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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