So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize