He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
