Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
